The Ultimate Question – is this for you?
There will be plenty of people who have planned an epic journey around the country or somewhere abroad (I would like to do that next) but when it all begins, they realise that ‘going it alone’ is not for them.
If you have time, consider all the options before moving forward. Think about the consequences.
My upcoming book How did I get here? focuses on the reasons why I have embarked on an alternative lifestyle.
Why are you doing this?
You may have reached a point in your life when it seems that there’s no other solution but to get away from it all. The monotony of the daily grind may have grated on you too many times.
The job isn’t for me anymore
It has dawned on you, possibly out of the blue, that life could be so much better if you enjoyed your job. We all need a change sometimes, maybe some time away will help you to decide what comes next. Maybe you need to retrain, or perhaps you need to change where you currently work.
It’s too overwhelming
You may have experienced the loss of a loved one or your long-term relationship has ended. Whatever the reason, having time to process the event, without the daily grind of work and routine, could give you a reset, improving your decision making for the future.
Mental Health
Mental health affects physical health and longevity.
Anxiety can affect every aspect of daily life. From how much sleep we get, even how difficult it is to get to sleep in the first place never mind waking up and lying there wondering why. To not leaving the house unless we have a duty-bound commitment to do so.
It affects our social interactions. Anxiety can cause worry about what we say during a conversation, to the point that it becomes the focal point of the day. We decline further verbal interactions due to our brains overthinking every aspect of what has already been said. We do that thing when our mouths open, the words come out and someone misunderstands us. We walk away because the situation becomes too overwhelming.
People Who Care
There are people who are patient with us. We befriend those who listen and accept our quirks:
The going off at a tangent
This can make people confused when we’re trying to explain something but it’s because we’re already thinking about the next question or our brains flip to a topic which seems unrelated to the discussion. Sentences are sometimes incomplete, or it appears to the other person as though we’ve changed the subject completely. Our brains work differently to other people, or it certainly seems that way.
Interrupting others
The way we interrupt, (not being intentionally rude), it’s just that we want to get our words across before the ‘allocated speaking slot’ is over with.
Of course, these traits could also be attributable to neurodivergence, a lack of self-confidence, or low self-esteem.
When they don’t seem to care …..
Sometimes it’s easier just to say nothing.
Other people can seem overbearing, and we feel like we have to compete with them to get our words out.
This comes from them losing their patience with us. It’s because we don’t always get the conversation done quickly enough, or so I’ve been informed..……
A glimpse of the raised eyebrow or the muffled sigh shuts us down altogether, forcing us to leave, with the aim of saving ourselves from the embarrassment and a lot of negativity.……
Questioning Oneself
Am I boring?
Why do I not fit in?
Do these people actually like me?
First Steps
Try to focus on those people who show that they want to be in your company, who show you that they care. These are the people who will stay in contact. Steer away from those who dismiss you. Separate yourself from the negativity.
Not everyone will get along all of the time. We must accept this. I’ve spent years trying to please people, to get along with them, to acknowledge their quirks when it seemed that they weren’t willing to accept mine.
NO QUICK FIX HERE
Going it alone in a camper or another type of transport, may not be a quick fix. It may not be the ultimate solution to the problem.
However, there are many advantages to doing this.
Freedom
The release you experience when the ‘normal’ routine doesn’t have to be followed. It can take a little while to adjust but when things settle, it’s the immense sense of freedom which fills you with joy.
Time for yourself
We often put others before our own personal needs. It’s not being selfish if you think about yourself sometimes.
Time to plan
Whether it’s changing your job, location, or both, time to sort everything out is precious.
Most of us benefit from a short time away, and for some people, that’s all that’s needed. Others may need to take a sabbatical, or a longer period of time when they’re not staying or working in the same place.
Final Thoughts
Setting off on a solo journey (for however long it may be), is a big commitment and a life-changing decision. The journey itself is not the only aspect to consider.
CONSIDER LIFESTYLE
If you’re finding it difficult to manage your day-to-day tasks, consider looking into alternative ways to improve your mental health.
Our mood may be affected by our lifestyle:
- how much exercise we have
- the food we eat
- how much (if any) alcohol we consume.
Making positive changes to daily habits and routines can be beneficial to mental health.
SEEK HELP
If you are struggling, the most important way of addressing the issues surrounding mental health is to speak to someone. It could be a close friend, or someone you know who has been through a similar situation. Whoever you seek out, do it sooner rather than later.
Organisations are more aware of people’s needs these days. If you work for an organisation which acknowledges mental health appropriately and you feel supported, talk to your HR (Human Resources) department.
If you feel embarrassed, or if you are self-employed or currently not working, book yourself a GP appointment initially.
If none of these options are for you, there are numerous helplines which support people in need of mental health support. Here are just a few:
Mind: 0300 102 1234 (lines open Mon-Frid 9am-6pm)
Samaritans: 116 123 (anytime)
NHS 111 (anytime)
For urgent mental health support, dial 999.
All numbers correct at time of publication.
SELF-REFERRAL
NHS Talking Therapies – sometimes it can be difficult to book something which fits into our daily lives, but it is possible to self-refer.
- once your referral has been logged, a professional will call you to initiate the process.
- there will be forms to complete to allow a group of professionals to determine the support/advice you need.
- don’t be put off if there is a long wait time, the advice/support you receive is invaluable.
You could pursue a private consultation with a qualified counsellor.
BUT, speaking to someone is the best move you can make. Opening up is the first step.
PLANNING
Take into account all aspects of your life before you embark on any major changes.
- Look at your life now and how it impacts your health and well-being.
- Scrutinise your finances, taking into account your home, whether you can afford to rent it out for a short while. You may decide that selling up is an option. Or if you’re renting yourself, whether it’s affordable to move on altogether.
- What about your career prospects? Can you do your job remotely, or do you need to reconsider your pathway?
- Consider a few trips away by yourself to begin with. Test it out first. Small steps, little wins.
Many questions, but individual to you. Not everyone will have the same answer.
Please note that the information contained in this blog is written from personal experience only, and should not be relied upon as a stand alone source of information – please see the disclaimer on my website.
Back next time for ideas about ‘coping’ when you’re in your camper.
